Fertile Weasley
by Dahlias
Summary: A short nine month look of Harry's Pregnancy with a defenseless Ron who's really an innocent victim in the big scheme of things... no, really. HPRW, Slash, Oneshot, MPREG!


**Title:** Fertile Weasley

**Author:** Dahlias

**Pairing:** Ron Weasley / Harry Potter

**Summary:** A short nine month look of Harry's Pregnancy with a defenseless Ron who's really an innocent victim in the big scheme of things... no, really.

**Rating:** PG13 - _Due to language and theme_

**Warning:** Slash, MPreg, Romance, Very Minute Angst, and Humor.

**Disclaimer:** Not mine... though I can't be sued for wishing right?

* * *

**Fertile Weasley**

_Dahlias_

**-1st month-**

Harry wanted to kill him... no, he wanted murder the bastard. A cup of tea was placed before him but he paid it no mind as he refused to remove his head from his arms that rested on the table. "Harry."

"Touch me and I castrate you." was Harry's response.

.

**-2nd month-**

"I hate you."

Ron looked up from his paper. "No you don't."

"Don't tell me what I feel. If I say I hate you then I hate you, you freckled prick!" Harry stormed away.

Ron sighed. Morning sickness didn't go so well for the Boy-Who-Lived.

.

**-3rd month-**

"Excuse me while I drown myself in the toilet." Harry slid off the table and padded to the bathroom, door clicking softly closed.

"Merlin, are you sure?" Ron's face was pale, his freckles standing out more than ever.

The Medi-Witch nodded her head, quite baffled herself. "I rechecked the results a dozen times."

"God... Harry!" Ron rushed to the door of the bathroom only to find it locked. "Baby? Harry!"

"Go away!" shouted Harry. "This all your fault! I was warned, I was told Weasley's had super sperm, they were like rabbits but did I pay any attention? No! Ronald Weasley! Your cock is not coming any where near me you hear me you bloody rabbit!"

.

**-4th month-**

"Come on Harry... please." pleaded Ron while on his knees.

Harry merely licked the spoon of chocolate syrup he had at one minute prior, pored over raw carrots. "No."

"You can't do this!"

"Oh yes I can. Look at me Ron; I'm a beached whale. This is all your bloody fault and you're reaping the consequences. You and your hands are very best mates until I'm able to take that potion."

Ron's face had a horrified expression. "But the contraceptive potion has to be taken three months after you've delivered."

"Sucks doesn't it?" Harry plopped the spoon back in his mouth and smiled around it.

"You sure as hell don't!"

.

**-5th month-**

"You're pregnant!" Mrs. Weasley's booming voice quieted the whole room. All the Weasley's - all of them - stared at an embarrassed Ron and a smug Harry.

"Twenty-Two weeks today. Ron was afraid to tell you but I over ruled him." Harry patted his now swollen stomach that had once been carefully charmed to hide his state of appearance. "Majority rules."

"Ronald Weasley!"

.

**-6th month-**

"Just tell them Harry." Said a defeated Ron who stirred his oatmeal with weak circles; he was dead tired.

"I thought it was to be a surprise?" Said Harry as he peeled his second pear to plop in his second helping of oatmeal; he was living up the cravings considering his morning sickness was mute.

"For my sanity, just tell the idiots."

"Oi!" Fred's displeasure of being labeled an idiot was met with a toss of bread that hit Ron square on the nose, causing the drowsy man to blink in confusion.

"I bet it's twins." Said George eagerly as he squirmed in his seat. All the Weasley's, who had been invited to the family Sunday supper, had made bets weeks ago.

"Has to be." Said Charlie, who eyed Harry's oversized belly from where he sat. "Look how fat he's gotten."

Well, Mr. Weasley merely winced, along with everyone else, Mrs. Weasley on the other hand was ready to reprimand her son when oatmeal including the bowl plus pears flew across the table to hit Charlie, having him fall back in surprise but he was saved from landing in a heap by Bill. Before he could comment on being covered with oatmeal and the bruise he was surely to receive from the bowl, he received a face full of oatmeal. "Hey!" wiping at the warm breakfast he found himself pelted with more breakfast.

Harry's chubby hand scooped up more of the oatmeal from the large pot near him. His face was set in a scowl as he again aimed and fired. It wasn't until he went to grab the pile of bacon did Ron snap out of his own shock did he grab Harry's wrist. "Not the bacon love. Anything but the pork."

Harry glared at him. "When I come back he had better be put in his place. I'm not fat! I'm just retaining water!" Harry tried to get up but his girth wasn't allowing him a quick exit, he did, however, accept help from Ron until he placed a hand on his lower back and waddled away.

Not a moment later did the table erupt into laughter - everyone but Charlie that is.

.

**-7th month-**

"I have weeks to go, I'm not invalid you know." said Harry as he sat himself in the offered chair that Ron had been trying to get him in, it was only by Hermione's touch that he did so.

"Yea Ron, he's not invalid." She placed a tray on Harry's lap. "Three lumps and two dollops of cream like you like it Harry."

Harry stuck his tongue out at Ron. "You're outnumbered again."

Scowling, Ron kicked at the leg of an empty chair. "I'm always going to be outnumbered." he complained.

"And whose fault is that?"

Ron threw his hands in the air. "Will you let it go already? It's not really my fault you ended up like this is it?"

Both Hermione and Harry looked up at him. "Yes." they said in unison.

Ron stormed away. "Fine!"

"Hmm." Hermione narrowed her eyes. "Such attitude, I hope you're not taking that?"

"I expect it. He's had no sex since our second visit to the Medi-Witch when I found out I was carrying more than one."

"I love it when you put him in his place. So, has he proposed yet?" leaning forward she tapped the glass of the teacup, warming the liquid, just like her pregnant friend liked it.

"Yes. But I told him we're not having any ceremony until our children can be there and walking. I want them able to remember bits of it."

"You can still say your vows and then have the ceremony later. I doubt you want to have your kids labeled Bastards, it's bad enough they have the stigma of your fame."

"I really don't see the big deal, you're a bastard. Besides, it really doesn't matter." Harry said firmly, munching on a jellied half of toast."

"To the wizarding world it does, especially with your status. An employer can overlook someone as common as me but not you or your descendants."

.

**-8th month-**

Baby Shower.

A dreadful tradition Harry wanted no part of but when he was ganged up by Mrs. Weasley and Hermione, plus Ginny, he really had no choice in the matter - really, he didn't. To him it was hell on earth with the ribbons, balloons, lace, and games that exploited his heaviness, plus all the touching. He really disliked strangers touching his swollen abdomen but he gritted his teeth and bore it, especially from those who brought him gifts, which was everyone.

Now he had everything necessary if he were to have twelve kids, it seemed as if everyone had either bought or built him a crib or bassinet as they were all unsure as to how many kids he were to have but Harry knew he was prepared for anything.

As they all - all woman besides him - sat and ate and talked of all the acts of mothering, not forgetting breast feeding or uncomfortable gas, Harry was relieved to know his boyfriend was hard at work with the baby's room. A large room that took out two guest rooms and was all in neutrals so no one would know the sex of the baby, hell Harry didn't want to know but Ron did so it was easier for him to wait - he was an impatient person but right now anything that brought discomfort to the red head he was happy.

"Come on Harry, time to measure your belly!"

God help him!

.

**-9th month-**

Swollen feet... swollen ankles... swollen everything. How he hated the Weasley who got him into this mess. Lately Ron couldn't do no right in Harry's eyes much to every visitors amusement. He was growled at, barked at, and damn well made into a personal slave considering Harry was stuck on bed rest. He even had to take maternity leave much to his embarrassment.

"Look, we're taking our vows tomorrow but no sex. When they're one we'll have a huge ceremony and... ow! Ow! Ow!" Harry clutched at his stomach as liquid streamed down his legs.

"Bloody Hell!" was Ron's response.

"You Fucking Bastard! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! This is all your fault you, you, man!"

.

**-Delivery-**

"You solemnly swear to love, cherish, and obey..." The Priestess winced as Harry screamed.

"Let's get this straight, I wont obey this prick!" growled out Harry. "Just hurry up! I do! I do!"

"And do you Ron..." again she was interrupted, this time her robe was gripped by a strong trembling hand and she squeaked as she was forced forward, nose to nose with a sweaty and hard breathing Harry Potter.

"Listen here, he's my bitch, he will do as I say and he's marrying me. Now get on with it or I'll open the gates of hell and toss you in on your arse. Do you understand me!"

"I do." squeaked Ron as his hand was squeezed, he was sure his hand was broken but he dared not complain.

"I now pronounce you bonded, congratulations." The Priestess said hurriedly before rushing out the room.

Ron kissed Harry and as he pulled away he was pulled forward. "When I'm through with this, I'm going to kill you!" Harry growled out and Ron believed every word he said.

"I see the head!" yelled out the Medi-Witch in excitement.

.

**-Epilogue: 1 year later-**

The ceremony was beautiful. There were flowers and lots of food plus dancing.

Nothing could go wrong - until little Potter's got their small hands on the cake. Ron Weasley officially gave up his name much to Harry's delight so it was strange to see red haired children with freckles and not try shout out 'Weasley' but like Mr. Weasley said - "The hair and freckles are hereditary."

Much to the surprise of everyone, including a very faint Hermione - who agreed to be godmother - there were four children born on December 15th, the las 3 minutes to midnight. There was from oldest to youngest, moments apart; Emilia Lilian Potter, Henry Arthur Potter, Amanda Molly Potter, and the crankiest of the bunch, Xavier James Potter.

All four gave the Weasley twins a run for their Galleon but Harry couldn't have felt more loved and more happier than when he held them, tears tracking down their delicate blotchy faces. He didn't mind they didn't much look like him what with hair and skin complexion, but he knew they were his when their eyes became their true colors - his eyes, his mothers eyes.

The ceremony might have been hectic but he couldn't ask for nothing more as he watched his children being held by the four 'Guests of Honor' that stood atop the podium with them.

Nothing would ever be the same, and as Harry watched as his and his husbands children be reprimanded for ruining one side of the cake - the bottom layer - he couldn't have felt more at peace and glad that he had something to live for besides a horny and fertile Weasley.

Life was good.

**-THE END-**


End file.
